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Sep. 23rd, 2009



I don't use LiveJournal any more.


Sep. 6th, 2009

Writer's Block: Top of the Charts

What's the most-played song in your music library?

Sep. 3rd, 2009

i'm the one who likes gardenia.

" i've been seeing all my friends in the city, walking alone in central park
i'm doing all the things that i've neglected, cause i traded them all to be in your arms.

it's been good getting to know me more"

Sep. 2nd, 2009

(no subject)

 a year ago i re-made my livejournal, it's weird to look through all my old entries. 
this tended to hold truth, exspecially now...:
"I'm really fake (I said I'm not gonna lie, I didn't make this thing to make myself seem more glamourous like most people do). Most people see through me, and I feel horrible for the people who don't. Once people figure me out, they usually start to hate me. I'm good at making friends. But I suck at keeping them.
Then there are those people who had me figured out from the beginning, those are the people who I consider my best friends. They know how to read me so well"
when i said really fake, i didn't mean it how it sounds when i read it. I meant it as i'm not what i appear to be when you first meet me. it sucks alot that they started to hate me. 

i've been keeping on my diet it seems to be the only thing i can depend on now. I'm really happy to go back to school and dance because i need something to keep my mindd off my social life. I'm kinda excited to not have one this year. I think my grades and my dancing is gonna improve alot. I got so many new clothes, but it's kinda bad that all i wear is skirts and dresses....

I need finish reading 19 minutes :) and then finish alice in wonderland, and then maybe sleep?

Sep. 1st, 2009

(no subject)

i havent eaten in days.
all i do is sleep and cry.
i need to leave

Aug. 27th, 2009

(no subject)

fuck all of you<3.

Jul. 27th, 2009

(no subject)

I don't wanna live my life with regrets and wonder why my life is a mes s .

Jul. 18th, 2009

(no subject)

summmer loooooooooove<33

Jul. 14th, 2009

(no subject)


Jun. 23rd, 2009

(no subject)

I haven't been seeing my massapequa friends, which I guess is okay. Considering they haven't even called me to see if I'm okay.

I've been going for blood work every day for like the past week, besides the weekend, getting 9-12 tubes of blood taken. It's the most annoying thing. I've been passing out all the time. The doctor says I'm suffering from exhaustion, and malnutrition. It's frustrating knowing I had mono since april and didn't find out until the end stage. My anemia is becoming really severe and my hemoglobin level is under 6.0 and my blood pressure keeps getting lower, which is why I constantly pass out. The doctor wants me hospitalized so they can monitor what I'm eating, and possibly feed me through a tube? fuck no. I'm finally skinny and where I wanna be. I'm not gaining it all back in a fucking hospital. My doctors/mom are also trying to get me to eat meat, which is not happening.

I'll stick with veggie burgers<3

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